Wednesday, August 11, 2010

Undercover Heathens

Note to readers If you are deeply religious, you might not find this funny. I would designate it as "Respectfully Irreverent." What I really found most entertaining about this whole museum/gift shop whatever was the complete lack of coherence and connection between displays. Maybe I just didn't get it (always a possibility with me) but this really did seem pretty damn, er, darn random.

I try to make it a point to explore and delight in the "attractions" of wherever I land. I have a book called "Day Trips from RDU" with one "place to visit" earmarked. This. Today turned out to be the day I made the trip with another adventure seeking pal, CB (name abbreviated due to the slightly irreverent nature of this whole excursion).

My money trap, I mean, my Saab was in the shop today so I was promised a loaner. It was the most underwhelming sedan ever, with a kind of funky smell. But, whoever used it last left in a CD called "Birthday 2003" that sounded more like wedding music one would play in 2003 and that was highly entertaining.

We made a quick stop another equally quirky location en route - Critters Corner. Note CB's attire. Short of a bike, remind you of anything? The outing also gave this CT girl a reason to wear her pearls - keep an eye out for them later.

Our destination was located in Southern Pines. As soon we get on this road, it became quite clear why. I am a big fan of trees that feel like a canopy.

The guidebook had double billed the museum as both a "Museum of Creation" and "Taxidermy Hall of Fame." After one of two display cases CB and I guessed that this was all just shit from someone's basement with loosely correlated bible quotes to accompany them.
Jamie checking out the knight's, um friends?

Here we come!

Ok, so the random picture of Ronald Reagan was the first tip off there might not be any sort of thesis to this museum.


I think CB and I were both equally delighted by the randomness. There were far more pictures and hilarity that I will be able to post and share. Some higlights, however.

Bibles and traffic signs


I think my absolute favorite was the display labeled "False Gods Worshiped In Place of the Creator." Here's our audio commentary.
Click here to listen to memo.mp3

Chick-fil-A in this museum I kind of understand. Golf, I do not. Unless you subscribe to golf as religion, which many do. But still.


It just kept on getting curiouser, and curiouser, as Alice might say. Plumber's first wireless phone?!


Jamie contemplating the wall of can openers.


Let's just have some of the pictures speak for themselves. Because, really, it was hard to know what to even say or think. Undertakers saw, used to cut off the ring fingers of the deceased. For real.


Jamie bonding with her alter ego, the pirhana (CB was taking the pics so therefore is in less of them).


Blissfully unaware of the world's largest Beanie Baby hovering above.


Stuffed beaver. Too bad this is a museum, not a yard sale.


Affirmation that CB and I are not an accident of nature.


What we consider buying from the gift shop. But don't.

(I had to pin my shirt by the way because it was too boobalicious otherwise).

We did make an admission donation though because we thoroughly enjoyed ourselves. And heck, perhaps salvation is for sale.

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